Wedding bells

I stood there looking at the cross
A cold wind that touched me gently
The purity that held me in drapes
Diamonds that shone through its cuts finely
Alas! I felt I looked pretty
I closed my eyes in prayer
As I felt Gods will being in power

I had walked a mile holding his (Dad)
Hand / He smiled happily
He knew he had to let go this once
And so he was ready to do so, peacefully
I followed his (fiance) eyes across the room
Getting lost into those tiny beads
My heart skipped to musical beats
As I felt the stares that filled the room
Yet he stood there calmly
It all seemed as perfect as destiny

I seemed to have reached even before
I could freeze my steps to admire
Tears filled as I thought
This was indeed ‘the beauty of God’s blessing’
For I had put up a calm fight
I knew the value of what I would be missing
If he didn’t stand beside me
If life had another truth so bare..

As chants filled the air
And songs added to the flair
I was lost in it like always
I felt accord with it in all ways
I focused at the cross again
Seeing it had finally happened
Then I realized a rare truth
“I had my whole world in my hand”
I was crowned and tied in a knot
My commitment for which I sought
For as it lay on my head
I saw the last wink of acceptance

So many witnessed it and so did they (parents)
Their tears that showed I was their life
For I was washed in their blood
And brought in their values
Tensions that crept their faces

Given a chance she would have flood
For she is the good old wife (mom)
I walked back happily
To be greeted by the smiles
Of all whom I loved so deeply
Flashes took away every second
Life’s so turned precious memories
Registered in my mind

I walked amidst the newly bond (in laws)
Sparkling like a star
Proudly as I still held his hand
Finding my life at par
Being united with them
That I secretly loved and cared
Holding their raw gem
I silently promised
“I’ll only be his”
N then the heavens poured
We all believed we had been blessed
For our Life had nothing more to miss
Than this heavenly bliss…..

Final Day of my life

I lie awake on the bed. I experienced the calmness that filled the room. Somehow this had been the day I recalled my past. I felt the linen cloth that wrapped me. I held on to it tight as I felt the raging storm within me. The beginning was just beautiful. The beauty that first crossed my eyes, the kiss that passionately touched my forehead and the warmth of an angel's love that helped me stay alive. I called this angel "Mom"-the reason that I stated as why I came here. She has often told me she couldn't take it alone as she owed me as a prayer of the man she immensely loved. I too loved him and he was worth it all. Dad - often had that nature of being loved by all who knew him. Towers, monsters, pests and most loving brothers, they identified themselves to my life. We grew up as litters left to our world. Nothing changed in 14 years or even more.Sooner each of us marked our ways reaching places that dreamed an imagination that was just so perfect. Perfection mastered by the creator, I truly adored. Life had its own surprises. Sometimes it showed a lifetime full of happiness or drained life out for the sorrows. There seems like nothing I wanted to remember now for the pleasure of life is all I expressed. I had less to cry any longer as the times of a broken heart, friendship and relationships had zoomed past. I wished to stay wake this night. I feared somewhere that tomorrow was a new beginning, a new one that I always waited.I scanned across the room and there he lay half asleep. He had woken up to me the last few hours holding my hand and smiling. I wondered if it was a sign of hope or just the fact that I constantly told him that I loved his smile. But whatever it was, I felt the beat of his love. The day he looked across to me, I got carried away into a world that was completely ours. The ironic feeling had to be when just a day seemed as long as a century in knowing him, and when just a day seemed shorter to be with him. Time struck us through this journey where every second was equivalent to living a lifetime. And it kept me wondering whether it was because I knew time was short or because love had that secret ingredient implanted in it. Life spoke words, meanings and expressions of love, togetherness and companionship. We could walk the waves or feel the heat of the coal with a smile for by then we knew God had control. I pained to realize that everything passed. We saw the blessings of this life grow into big dreams destined to touch the life of millions. We saw them complain, cry aloud for all the attention, laughing and bonding. They were our pride always. We had given our lives to them.Suddenly his face grew faint. A loud beep ran across the room. I then, heard the voice that I loved hearing. The voice that often sung to me, the voice that threw into fits of laughter and cry, the voice that I waited upon and never ceased to love. Rushing into the room came, the same image that described to have held me in the beginning. She caught my hand and I let go. My heart, soul and mind froze that moment and I breathed alas.

The Curse of love

In the silence of the night as she sat in front of her computer, disturbed from her sleep, she wondered in pain “Again?! Why?”

Her mind had raced through flashbacks of her past. Her first love, her second one and now… She wanted to so badly believe that the last two times had not been love. She couldn’t frame out a perfect reason why she stood alone and not married in the first place. Like every little girl, she had actually drawn out a guy that would completely sweep her off her feet. But she overlooked only one quality, a niche like anyone would see it – true love. Somehow it seemed to her, that she had mastered this from God whose truth was the power of love. In it, she fell to the clutches of fantasizing a world that ceased to exist as destiny held other plans. It felt not lesser than a glass shattering into pieces as it hit the floor for none cud find all the pieces or even fix it together. The first time she went through this feeling, she pledged that she wouldn’t thread this track again. That she would fight to ensure that love wouldn’t make her so weak n hostile and that she would accept a decisive natural course thrust upon her by her parents. But to her dismay, there was another. She mustered her courage to fight the society as her bread to live in love but then she found herself standing at the altar alone as the vows of marriage was pledged to someone else by her lover. Defeated and in great dismay, she looked beyond the feelings of her heart, killing every bit of herself to just live. But her calculative plan failed her again once more and this time she couldn’t take it anymore. She talked out loud that she was a victim of destiny and promised she wouldn’t hurt. Little did she realize that this man had come for her soul and that, it was the only thing left for her to trade. He healed the wounds of the past and taught her to dream. He had been the one she needed and the truth in his love held her close. But as she worked out her first dream and started to live in it, she was flashed with the reality that took off her sleep. She knew that love has been a curse to her that she often taught the world to love and spread it, opened the chapters to people who couldn’t believe but found herself alone and not tied down in love.

Closing her eyes and slowly wiping her tears, she spoke to God : I fail to understand why but when I do, I surely would never be able to love again!!